The two of you are sitting across from a table, looking at each other. Your hands feel clammy from perspiration brought on by the awkward silence that now fills the room ... and you're not sure if you have the attributes that will get the telephone call -- and the accompanying invitation -- from the other person within the next few days. Such thoughts make you shift your weight from one foot to the other to calm those pangs of nervousness now jumping around in your stomach....
The above paragraph is an all-too-common experience for people who not only go out for job interviews, but also on first dates. These two situations have many things in common, including what to wear and how to behave ... but the real connection is they're both a mutual exchange of information where both parties can learn more about each other.
Before you do research on a potential employer / significant other, you should do a self-evaluation. Know what strengths (and weaknesses) you bring to the respective partnership, what goals you hope to accomplish through the partnership, and -- most important -- how to effectively communicate those wants and needs. Remember, you're selling yourself as a package that can contribute to the other party's big picture.
After assessing your own qualities, assess those of the other party. Learn as much as possible about the employer / significant other before the "meeting." For the employer, find out what kind of service they provide, how long they've been in business, and if the size of the company is to your liking. This can be done by simply browsing through their Web site before the interview. As for the significant other, ask about his / her hobbies, aspirations, and idiosyncrasies. Such information is usually obtained in the "pre-date" conversation, the telephone call that occurs before the date.
Dressing for the occasion is probably the easiest part of preparing for the "meeting." Common sense dictates what you wear -- your outfit should be appropriate for the environment where the interview / date occurs. For the interview, a professional wardrobe (i.e., a dress or blouse and skirt / slacks for ladies; a three-piece suit or dress shirt and slacks for guys) always works best ... but for a date, you can be more casual. If it's a picnic and billiards, don't wear nightclub apparel ... and if it's a movie and bowling, don't show up in formal attire.
When you go for the interview, you're looking to play an active role in that company's future. Likewise, when you go on a date, you're hoping to be a major part of that person's future. The conversation should reflect an interest on both parties' parts. Ask and answer questions accordingly; the purpose of getting together is to exchange information -- not stare at each other. Put your best foot forward and highlight your good traits (while downplaying your bad ones), explaining what separates you from the rest of the pack. Find out if you're a good fit for the employer / significant other ... and, just as important, find out if the employer / significant other is a good fit for you!
Assuming all goes well, you'll receive an invitation to join the company's staff or go out on a second date. You'll work for many years, about forty hours a week, with a record of accomplishments to show for the time you put in as an employee -- not to mention a pension plan and a house in the suburbs. Relationships aren't any different: you have to invest time and effort if anything good is to come out of it. Just like a work-oriented relationship, you want something to show for the time you and your significant other have spent together -- such as a lifetime commitment and a bundle of joy. Unfortunately, though, fantasy doesn't always equal reality.
In all likelihood, you'll go through several interviews / dates before finding the job / person of your dreams. You'll even have to take a few jobs you hate before making a living at what you love ... and date several losers before finding your soul mate. Think of the bad experiences as preparation for life in the real world; few people get lucky the first time around. If that doesn't help, know that those bad experiences make you appreciate the good ones even more. That's what life -- job interviews and first dates included -- is all about.
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